It’s the week after the week before, well it was when I started this blog. It’s now 3 weeks after the week before and already it feels like life wants to take me out. Nowadays it takes very little for us to feel overwhelmed with the issues of life and unless we create balance, have a good support network and remain focussed on our goals, life can become quite discouraging.
A few weeks ago I was enjoying the Scottish countryside without a care in the world. Upon arrival, just the thought of not having to think about work was a weight off my shoulders. Being there I realised we cause ourselves much stress by not applying the correct balance to our lives. The over overexertion of any one thing becomes an obsession that rules our life, even good things can lead us astray, causing us to neglect other duties.
Being a multiple business owner, it does not take much for me to be affected by something going wrong. Having an off day, being tired or just my never-ending to-do-list can consume me, which is why I have spent this past year being on the ball when it comes to my mind and what I allow to reside in my dominant thought area. Our thoughts are like bacteria, which given the right conditions multiply every 20 minutes in what is called the danger zone. If the wrong thoughts reside in that dominant thought area, then it’s the wrong thoughts that will multiply and in time take you out!
Being away gave me an opportunity to empty my mind and breathe, slowing everything down to a relaxed, controlled peaceful pace. One morning during my prayer time, it struck me how tired and weighed down I had become. How despite the fact I have been working and getting things done, I had become weary, overloaded and obese with silent mental stress.
I needed to lose weight, drop a few pounds, work it off, exercise, create a new eating plan, and I mean that metaphorically. Upon returning I would end up in the same boat if something didn’t change. What was interesting was I had known this all along, but was unable to comprehend and change it until I stopped, down tools and did the very thing a busy lifestyle will tell you-you don’t have time to do.
With one ear we hear ourselves been called away from the mayhem, with the other, we discuss the reasons why the world cannot survive without us for a while. I’m not saying its easy, being self-employed, there is never a good time other than the Christmas week for me to get away, which means every time I take time out, I am taking time from something else, going against the obstacles and reasonings my mind throws, in favour of what my heart, body and soul desire.
Changing My Diet
Mention the word diet and people freak out, but we all need to change and adjust our diets depending on where we want to go in life. For me it’s all about renewing my mindset, tearing down the negative blocks, resetting my natural default and becoming a better me. I’m the only one that can change who I am.
When I set out to wake up at 4am every morning to spend time writing and finish my second book, I had no idea how much of a positive impact it would have on my life. I had been waking up at 5am for years to pray and read before the day began and though I had come to a place where depression no longer consumed me, I still had habits and natural default systems centred around it. Some days I would be working with a literal heavy cloud hovering over me, trying to wear me down, with only perseverance holding me up, it was hard!
I was rarely intentional about my days or time and had dreams, but no goals, no focus, no plan.
I wish I had known the power of goal setting back then. that regardless of what my emotions fed me, the goal was still there and it had not disappeared. That when it came to pursuing your dreams, regardless of how unsuitable and powerful my emotions were, they could be controlled and retrained. I still get days when my emotions entice me to give up, but my disciplines have become so rooted they automatically kick in and take over, and for me this is the most WONDERFUL feeling in the world, doing something because I have a goal and not relying as I did before on how I feel day to day.
The Right Food
What you eat mentally will determine how you act. Today my mental diet consist of a disciplined routine that I am still coming to terms with to find the best fit for me. It’s a bit like having all the ingredients but trying out a few dishes and cooking methods to see if you prefer your food grilled, boiled or baked. If you are serious about change, here are a few things that have impacted and help change my mindset. It’s not enough to read the books, you have to do the work.
Having A Goal
It’s true, you have to have a focal point, I have a few, but the one that gets me out of bed at 4am in the morning is the goal to complete my 2nd book. I’ve been writing this book for 12 years, mostly saying I’m writing, but not actually writing.
My 2nd goal is to get fit, just because I’m small does not mean I am fit, and I’ve always wanted to be toned. That picture above, that you looked at and wondered why is she working out, I look like that because recently I have been working out. Like you, I joined the gym, was paying for the gym and not going to the gym. Then I committed to 5 mins of exercise a day because 10 was too much to motivate myself, and in time increased it to 10, 15 and 20-30 minutes, now I’ve added running to it and I do all this from home, how? Discipline!
I don’t get it right all the time and still have a longs way to go, but what is great is the difference in the way I think and carry out my days. That commitment to rising at 4 to right, once installed spilt over into other areas of my life and is now helping me to get my life under control and reach all my goals.
Managing all the above on my own is a lot, in fact, it’s not a lot, it’s humongous. Way too much for one person. I’m responsible for the cake making, admin, marketing and website of Jemz Cake Box, the same with GRG and my book. What keeps me sane now days is prayer, a LOT of prayer and trying to stay as focused as I can, if not I will start to feel like this
People say I enjoy being busy, I don’t. People tell me to keep doing what I’m doing, if I listen to them I will keel over with the pressure. I can’t keep doing this on my own, I need help, but until that help comes I can set things in order to manage the stress and pressure.
My Daily Diet
I’ve changed my diet a few times and still trying to find what fits for me, but this is presently part of what my diet looks like
- 4am -writing
- 5:50 blogging/ update social media – Meet the author
- 6am Devotion
- 7:30 Excercise
- 8am Breakfast
- 8:30 Tidy house
- 9am Admin Jemz
- 10am Admin GRG
- 11am Jemz Cake Box
- 12:30 lunch /reading
- 1:15 Jemz Cake Box
- 6pm GRG, Jemz Cake Box – paperwork, marketing, etc…
- 9:30 run
- 10pm bed
Obviously, it changes from week to week an often day-to-day, but the 4am – 8:30 is non-negotiable. Like everyone, there are days when I struggle. I’m not perfect, but the more I implement the above the more driven and focused I become, so on days when I do lapse, my body having got used to the new regime automatically fights to pursue it.
For those of you struggling with mental health, I recommend changing your diet, starting off simple and getting support, accountability to help change your natural default setting. If I can do it, you can do it. At first, it was hard, and somedays I do start to feel bad when I fall off the wagon, but unlike before I don’t stay there, I can’t. I get up, literally, and feed the emotion that wants to remain positive and in control, because that emotion feels GOOOOOOD
Am I happy? I’m getting there day by day, step, by step, nibble by nibble, one bite at a time.
I would love to hear how you have gone about changing some of your habits or the challenges you have experienced, so drop me a line and let’s see how we can help each other grow, excel and soar